Grab a cup of coffee and pull up a chair, friends. It’s been a little while since I sat down to really open up here, and if you’ve been following along with our story, you know that this space is where I share the raw, the real, and everything in between.
Today, I’m sharing an update on our family-building journey one filled with a few plot twists I honestly never saw coming.
Healing, Hoping, and Holding On
After going through my endometriosis procedure, Brett and I gave it another six months. We held onto so much hope, praying that endometriosis was the missing puzzle piece, the sole thing standing between us and a positive test. We waited, we hoped, and we dreamed.
When those six months passed without our miracle, we decided it was time to take the next step and explore IUI.
We walked into the clinic on my 30th birthday, expecting a step forward. Instead, we got news we completely weren’t expecting. Because of our “unexplained infertility” diagnosis, our doctor gently explained that IUI wouldn’t actually increase our statistical chances of conceiving.
I will always be deeply grateful for her honesty. She didn’t want to take our money for a procedure she knew in her heart wouldn’t help us. She broke down the reality: after four years of trying, with nothing logistically wrong on either of our ends, IVF was our best, most viable route.
Processing the Unimaginable
To say it hit us hard is an understatement.
It took us a lot of time to process. This wasn’t what our love story, or our vision of growing our family, was supposed to look like. How did we get here? Why is it so complicated for some, while it comes so easily for others?
Naturally, our minds immediately went to the logistics, most notably, the financial weight of IVF. Weighing the cost of our future family against our current life took heavy, careful thought. Initially, we told ourselves we would pause, take a breath, and look into starting this new chapter in the new year. “We’ll regroup then,” we thought. “We’ll give ourselves a break.”
What Are We Waiting For?
After about a week of sitting with our thoughts and letting the dust settle, a hard truth hit us: the years just fly by as we get older.
I found myself asking, “What are we actually waiting for? What does waiting for the new year do for us?”
Aging as a woman casts a heavy shadow over this process. The clock ticks a little louder, and the mountain feels a little steeper the longer you wait. And when you realize you’ve already been doing this exhausting, beautiful, heartbreaking dance for years… you realize you’ve already waited long enough.
Brett and I talked it through, looked at where we are, and realized we are fortunate enough and ready enough to take this leap.
Stepping Into the Unknown
We aren’t waiting for the calendar to flip anymore. We are stepping into the IVF journey now.
If this journey has taught me anything, it’s that life rarely goes according to your neatly written blueprint. It’s messy, it’s unpredictable, and it asks more of you than you ever thought you had to give. But it’s also filled with resilience, deep love, and a refusal to give up on the family we are meant to have.
Thank you, as always, for holding space for me, for reading, and for walking this path alongside us. Pour yourself a fresh cup today, and send up a little prayer for us as we take this next big step. We’ve got this.
With love,
Kait M. 🤍
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